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Lexiphiles

Started by HSantal, Mar 26 2012 08:14 AM

#1 HSantal

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Posted 26 March 2012 - 08:14 AM

Lexiphiles

Lexiphiles (i.e."lovers of words", you know) like . . . you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish . . . or,
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger . . . . then it hit me . . . .etc.).

Well, here we go......



To write with a broken pencil is . . . pointless.

When fish are in schools they sometimes . . . take debate.

A thief who stole a calendar . . . got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles . . . U.C.L.A.

The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes . . . was on shaky ground.

The batteries were given out . . . free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married . . . they fought tooth and nail.

A will is a . . . dead giveaway.

If you don't pay your exorcist . . . you can get repossessed.

With her marriage, she got a new name . . . and a dress.

You are stuck with your debt if . . . you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia : . . . The LAN down under.

A boiled egg is . . . hard to beat.

When you've seen one shopping center . . . you've seen a mall.

Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was . . . resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

If you take a laptop computer for a run you could . . .. jog your memory.

A bicycle can't stand alone; . . . it is two tired.

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory . . . which was never developed.

Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.

Acupuncture . . . a jab well done.
I do what I can.

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If a man, standing in the forest says something, and his wife isn't there to correct him, is he still wrong??

#2 Cpl Ledanek

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Posted 26 March 2012 - 02:16 PM

BRAVO!!!
add me to your Facebook
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#3 Swedish_Seb

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Posted 27 March 2012 - 05:20 AM

Good ones! :thumbsup:

"Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was . . . resisting a rest." Memories...
"With a good iron pipe one strikes the whole world with astonishment."
- Socker-Conny (1961-1989)
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#4 Nemesis

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Posted 27 March 2012 - 12:45 PM

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A will is a . . . dead giveaway.

Just reminds me...My mother recently spoke to me saying she has arranged her will......I asked her for what day :-)
Regards
Nemesis

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The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.




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